If anyone secretly says things against his neighbor, I
will stop him (NCV, Psalm 101:5).
Every single one of us has been hurt by people talking about
us. But if we were honest, we’d also have to admit that we’ve all said things
we shouldn’t, often about people who weren’t there to defend themselves.
The first step to vanquishing gossip is to keep our mouths
shut. Our mothers were right: If you can’t say something nice, don’t say
anything at all.
But what should we do when a gossip tries to engage us in
conversation about someone else? It takes two to gossip: one to speak, and
another to listen. There are things we shouldn’t say, but there are also things
we shouldn’t listen to.
What if someone tried to gossip, but no one would
participate?
When someone tries to engage you in gossip, try active
non-participation. Say, “Excuse me; Bill’s my friend, and that’s not
something I want to hear. You shouldn’t talk to anyone else about this either,
but if it’s something you feel strongly about, talk to Bill – just between the
two of you.” Of course, there’s always the ever popular option of responding
with Plan B: “Hey, when I talk to Bill later today I’ll be telling him
everything you said” [12].
I’d be really surprised if you need to have that
conversation with someone more than once. Of course it won’t stop them from
talking about you.
TODAY’S MEDITATION
Ask God to help you develop
and implement a strategery to confront gossip.
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