What shall we do for our sister for the day she is spoken for? (Song of Songs 8:8)Here the writer explores the role of family in helping the young develop healthy sexual attitudes and boundaries. Keeping in mind Shulamith's repeating charge: Do not awaken love until the time is right (2:7), we have a foundation from which to interpet 8:8-12.
The speaker has changed. Now we have the older siblings of a young woman asking how they can protect their little sister: If she is a wall, we will build towers of silver on her. If she is a door, we will enclose her with panels of cedar (v. 9). The poetically blunt message here is that walls keep people out and doors let people in. If our sister has good judgment and maintains healthy boundaries with boys, then we will reward her with praise. But if she is promiscuous and acts more like a door than a wall, then we will be her wall. We will protect her until such a time as she is able to make better choices.
The message of verses 11 and 12 is clear. Solomon owns many vineyards and they are his; he can buy or sell as he pleases. Shulamith uses poetic language and says she has a vineyard as well. Regardless of Solomon's wealth and power, she alone is steward over her own sexuality. [1]
How can you help the children and teenagers in your life develop healthy sexual boundaries?
[1] Joseph C. Dillow, Solomon on Sex (Nashville: Thomas Nelson, 1977), 151ff.
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